Me, Ryan and Pete
Chapter 1: Make Up Just To Break Up
First month at college, as freshmen, and still Ryan and Brendon were together. It was surprising, really. Romance had only surfaced in their last year at high school, breaking the social boundaries through some miracle of events. Brendon laughed softly to himself as he hummed old jazz songs. From naïve religious Mormon to wild boyfriend, the change was quite spectacular.
His upbringing had been strict and deeply religious, full of tradition. He never really acted as himself- Brendon only found who he was when he entered high school. Sure, it was hell, but it introduced him to music, that amazing thing that saved him and brought out his personality. He would never forget that first day when he set eyes on Ryan Ross.
Brendon smiled and crossed the dormitory room to his desk, taking out a photograph. It showed him and Ryan in their dorky rock clothes, which they had found cool at the time, playing guitar together and gazing into each other's eyes. Ryan always found that picture cute whereas Brendon made out it was too cringy. He secretly adored it. It was one of their best moments together, a day after Brendon confessed to his best friend he loved him. He still remembered every detail. It was winter time, on break from school, and Ryan came over every day to sing, make music or just hang out. They had been alone in Brendon's house, and Brendon finally found the courage to touch Ryan's leg. Ryan had ignored him at first but then Brendon had took his hands and whispered quietly his secret. Brendon giggled as remembered. There had been snowflakes outside as they shared their first kiss. So romantic, the perfect setting.
A whole year after seeing the silent and sensitive Ryan in the corridors, his hair long and his eyes downcast, Brendon was still with him. They made the decision to move out of Las Vegas together, and they moved to the suburbs of Chicago, far from his hometown. They enrolled at college together, and both got jobs to support their education. Brendon and Ryan managed to get a dormitory room for themselves, and life was very good. Yes, Brendon sighed happily, slipping the photo back into the drawer and glancing out the window. Life was fucking excellent.
Brendon laughed, seeing Ryan hurrying across the lawn with groceries in his arms. "Ry!" he called, waving. Ryan looked up, blinking.
"Brenny, hey. I got you that CD." he called back, smiling sweetly. "I'll be up in a minute, I've just gotta give Janice some stuff."
Brendon nodded and ducked his head back inside. Janice and Elaine were good friends of theirs, and had rooms across the hall. They were a lesbian couple from New York, and probably the only people in Chicago so far who treated them with any respect. Like Ryan and Brendon, their relationship hadn't been accepted back home, but Brendon found that they were amazing people. Janice had the brain of a guy, with sex always on her mind. She and Ryan had very in-depth conversations about positions, protection, and such. Elaine was closer to Brendon, with a creative nature, and she helped him with his song-writing.
"Bren, I'm back. I've got TONS of work to do! I'm not sure if I can make that party tonight
" he said, walking in and dropping a bag on the desk. Brendon could hear the clinking of wine bottles. He looked over with a grin. "Planning something?" he grabbed Ryan around his neck and kissed him playfully. Ryan nuzzled his neck then continued to the desk to take out his work.
"Well, no reason why we can't have a party in our bedroom
Brendon laughed. "Good idea! After your work, though. I'm not having you fall behind. Shakespeare, is it?"
Ryan had taken a college course in English and Brendon had taken one in music. The courses suited them both, and Brendon was especially happy that they could stay together and not part ways because of their learning.
Ryan paused and pushed his notes aside. "Brenny, are you happy here? With me?"
"Of course! Why wouldn't I? I've got the best guy in the entire world!"
Ryan gave a small smile. "Its just- this is getting a bit serious. Living together. Moving out of Vegas. Sharing the same bed-" he stopped. "Is it always gonna be like this?"
He spoke like he was bored of their relationship. Brendon's entire mood changed. "Are- are you leaving me?"
"No! I- I don't want things to go too fast. I'm not sure I want to do this forever. I want to- experience- other things
"Oh." Brendon went cold. "Has a girl caught your eye?"
Ryan took his hand, looking at him sincerely. "It's not like that."
"So, you still want to sleep with me, but fuck girls as well?" Brendon asked bitterly, snatching his hand away. Ryan was always curious. He'd never admitted to being completely gay, but Brendon knew he'd been with girls. Many girls.
Ryan lowered his eyes and was quiet for a minute. "I'm not married to you, Brendon."
"That still doesn't give you the right to CHEAT on me!"
There was a heavy silence. Ryan turned from Brendon and resumed his work, ignorant of his boyfriend's worries. Brendon was furious. How could he dare to think of anyone else after all they'd been through together? He stormed across the room to the bed, hiding under the covers moodily. He normally did this when they argued, and Ryan would always follow, leading to a quick make-up and a very good night. Unfortunately, after waiting half an hour, Ryan never followed. Brendon hid under the sheets, kicking off his clothes. He cried quietly, unwilling to admit his defeat in front of Ryan. This must be serious. Surely Ryan wasn't ALREADY cheating on him? He COULDN'T be! Him and Ryan- they were in a proper relationship, something meaningful and something Brendon intended to have for the foreseeable future! He could NOT just break off now, leave and 'explore' his sexuality! He had promised himself to Brendon!
Brendon sniffled and drifted off to sleep, the thoughts raging around his head. By the time he woke, it was morning, and the sun shone straight into his eyes. His belly growled. He hadn't eaten last night. He tried to turn over to see what the time was, and found himself stuck. Wet lips pressed against his bare shoulder and gentle fingertips grazed his back.
"Good morning, honey." Ryan whispered.
Brendon groaned. "Were you fucking me in my sleep again?"
"Well, there's something up my ass and it is NOT a bloody pillow!" he said grumpily, pushing Ryan away and closing his eyes. He attempted to hide how happy he was that Ryan was making up with him, but a huge goofy grin spread across his face.
"Aw, Brenny-bear, you're smiling! You forgive me?" Ryan asked hopefully, kissing Brendon's neck. "I am sorry, Bren, I just- my mind was elsewhere."
"Who were you thinking about?"
"No-one. I want a bit of freedom. Not for other girls."
Brendon twisted around to face him, brushing a strand of that floppy brown hair aside. "Other guys? Look, RyRy, if you've got a crush on another dude, I'm experimental enough to share you
"I don't want a threesome, Bren! I only want you. You know that. We're in love. All I want is a bit of room. Can you do that?"
Brendon stared, puzzled. "Room? Like, move out?"
"No, just let me do my own thing for a bit. Is that all right?"
Ryan smiled and kissed his nose, a hand creeping over Brendon's naked body. Brendon giggled girlishly and blushed, pulling Ryan under the covers. "You don't need to fuck me in my sleep, Ry- I'm more than willing to do it consciously